Patsy j Payne | patsyjpayne

Learn how to Focus your Ange

Dec 22nd 2010 at 3:26 PM

Learn how to Focus your Anger

I'm going to start my article with a link from a valued friend of mine.

His article takes me in a different direction. Many years ago, I owned a counseling practice called "Conflict Resolutions Counseling".

Where is this heading, there is usually more than one way to handle anger and  avoid  escalation to rage.

I was contracted by the courts to facilitate and one-on-one counsel family violence perpetrators (the people committing the offense). Suddenly my case load fell off, mmm. What is happening. I called a Probation Officer friend of mine and asked him if he was aware of any changes.

He shared with me that the court had changed the curriculum from 8weeks to 12weeks. Mmmm.

First thought, why wasn't I told. Anger! I fussed and fumed, no resolution. I called my mother and she had an awesome suggestion. She suggested I come to Kerrville with my curriculum and we revise to fit the criteria. She helped me to focus my anger constructively. We completed the revision, the court accepted it and my referrals increased. Moral: If you cannot let your anger go, learn to focus it constructively. Example, in my relationship I get angry sometimes. Rather than fuss with my husband, creating an argument, I go do some housework.

As I was writing this article another event occurred that required refocus of anger. My bank called and asked if I had made some unusual purchases. One was Victoria Secrets for $211.88. Mmmm. The end result was someone has a credit card number (including name and address) of mine and WAS using it to make catalog purchases. My bank closed that card and is reissuing  a new card. I called my apparent credit card protection company. Seems they don't do that anymore, however, did not advise their customers. Bottom line, even though I was angry, I re-focused and said, OK find a company that will protect me. It just so happens we have such a person in our membership. I skyped and asked her how to enroll in her program. The paperwork is on its way. The awesome part, we were already members of the prepaid legal she is an affiliate for, so it is just a matter of upgrading. Had I let my anger distract me, there is no telling what the result would have been.

Focus your anger!  Don't let it turn to rage.

Please to comment
Jan 2nd 2011 at 4:09 PM by judyhwright
Excellent article. I have written a number of articles on anger at I also write about bullying and sometimes those kids are so filled with anger, it just explodes. Good luck. jhw

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