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I just love internet surfing: That is what I do most of the time. Before this mania started I was an avid reader. I love cooking, some social work, raising kids. I do some gardening during summer. Just like anybody else I stay busy as much as I can and out of trouble. I am not an extremist, but little religious. If time permits I love walking or some workouts. That is it for now.
Warrier | 4SFI

Negative remarks: Are they bothering you? Then read this.

Sep 22nd 2010 at 6:24 PM

Have you ever heard this? People who are less confident make negative remarks about others. When their own self esteem start questioning them, when they feel insecure, they start blaming others. Reasons may be genuine, or made up. A normal healthy person may not notice this negativity in the other, but an unhealthy minded person notice this, find fault with and start questioning whether they are matter to them or not.

According to WHO, health is defined as," physical, mental, and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.." So even though a person thinks he has no existing medical condition, he still has to think about his emotional, psychological, and social condition, before he predicts himself as healthy.

When you hear about a negative remark: you can peek in to yourself and see if that is factual, or it is just  another mind's creation. If you are sound in mind and body you will take all that with a balance, check it for yourself and correct it if possible, or let it go. realizing that the other person was not quite right there. But if you are unhealthy, when you hear a remark, you  show anger, hostility, revenge and all sorts of frustrations, instead of correcting yourself ( if there is reality there), or taking it easy on yourself if that was not truth.

What I am talking here is, either way criticism is very useful in developing a strong personality, a healthy mind / body, and respect in society, if you take it in the right way. Just like medications in right doses are beneficial, negative remarks can help cure the self pride. When criticism bother you, you may have got an overdose of it, or may be you are too immature to handle it, or you just like to retaliate to the source. It all defines the person or personality of the person.

Does that bother the other person?  Not really.You spent your time, energy, and emotions on something that is not useful, and made yourself miserable, felt uncomfortable and unworthy in your own eyes.

As social beings, humans are capable of making adjustments, that is true physically and emotionally. So right attitudes, and right thinking about yourself and about others can avoid lot of miseries. Stop believing in your perceptions, but search for truth or reality. Stop judging others based on your perceptions, but look what majority think about that person (or incident). Negative remarks when start pricking you from everywhere, look in to yourself and make an adjustment, rather I would say a change, and feel happy about it, instead of feeling worthless or small.

This is not for a small percent of the society, but majority of men, women  even kids are affected by what we call" ego clash". Accepting advises and making corrections are hard because of the fear of failure. But the great souls whenever they lived made it possible by making themselves humble. Water flows from high level to low level, the reservoir is supposed to be in a lower level than the acual flow, to make it effective. So if you want to receive you want to make yourself available, have an appetite, and also need to know that you are lacking.

So  by accepting counsel, and realizing mistakes, we can strive to achieve perfection, eventhough we know it is hard in this imperfect system of things.

 

4 comments
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Nov 16th 2010 at 12:55 PM by phylma
Your article made me take a look at how I sometimes react to negative remarks and the reasons why this might happen. Good insight for everyone.
   
Sep 24th 2010 at 11:10 AM by onqglobal
Only after you Show that Warrier has addressed before I may give my Understanding to the Subject matter... if you care to hear... First, in Respect to Warrier and yourself: weedermann... I'm Out!
   
Sep 24th 2010 at 10:43 AM by weedermann
Warrier, this is an eye-opening article, one I wonder at. You say "As social beings, humans are capable of making adjustments, that is true physically and emotionally. So right attitudes, and right thinking about yourself and about others can avoid lot of miseries." Define "right thinking and right attitudes"? Do most humans retreat to a calm, detached perspective to reorient themselves when their "emotional buttons" are pushed? I don't think so. You say: "Stop believing in your perceptions, but search for truth or reality. Stop judging others based on your perceptions..." I agree that human OUGHT TO do this (if they knew HOW to "search for truth and reality") but it gives humans a heady sense of power to effectively belittle another, whether covertly or overtly. Most (teen) sitcoms and films get high ratings because they are BASED on this kind of petty peer-pressure and social popularity. Then those kids grow into adults who play the same games. Your article is, to me, a FINE sentiment but one that I don't think most humans are actively living yet.
   
Sep 24th 2010 at 9:39 AM by onqglobal
I Luv your Focal Point touching on the person that's on the receiving end's approach to their Inactive manner to these type of encounters or situations. The other you have No Command nor Control over. The Focal (test) at this Focal Point is you (me) in the receiving position. To Peruse oneself to Make any Necessity Changes. Health and Success have a Coupling Aspect that can be Denied, However, Not in Practicability of day-to-day Activities. That Coupling is Simply = both Must be Approached as; Viewed as; Maintained as s On-going Project(-s)! There's no standing still! There's no Final Arrival Point! There's Absolutely the Continuum Care to Remain and|or Improve from any Lacking to get Better from that "Exposed Focal Point". So, in closing, there may a "Silver-Lining" in a Negative! However, it'll Depend on the Attitude Level of the Receiver. "Warrier | 4SFI" attempts to Bring your Mental-Taste-Buds to the water; Will you @least Perusal the "Refreshment Afford To You". Plus, for those that agree with >her< in my thinking Must Show Support. If you don't then of course, you cannot!
   

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