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Paul O’Donnell | paulodonnell

How To Protect Your Child From The Harmful Effects Of Divorce

Oct 20th 2015 at 2:23 AM

Here is a discussion on how to best protect children from the various negative side effects of a divorce.

One of the hardest parts of any divorce is the impact it has on the children. There is no way to avoid the trauma altogether, but parents can find ways to lessen the blow. In can be difficult, in the middle of a divorce, to know what avenues to take to make the transition better for the kids. Here are some ideas to incorporate in order to minimize some of the harmful effects of this situation.

The absolute best resolution for any divorce is to manage to keep it out of court. Being able to come to an agreement on custody and other aspects of divorce ahead of time makes the process smoother and easier for all involved. If there are some areas that simply can’t be resolved on their own, consider mediation first. Taking a more amiable approach will make the environment better for all parties involved – especially the children.

It may seem to make sense to shelter the children from the divorce as much as possible. However, leaving them in the dark to make their own assumptions will only cause stress and additional emotional turmoil. Talk to the children about what is going on. Constantly reassure them that it is not their fault and that there is nothing they have done or could have done that would have changed the outcome. Remind them every day that both parents love them very much. Keep the lines of communication open and answer any questions or concerns they might have with empathy.

The level of change involved in going from one home to two households can be both tricky and confusing. When the children are present, it’s essential to focus on them and their welfare. Plan something fun to bond with them individually and keep them occupied. Personal attention will do wonders for the self-esteem and stress level of the children. Make certain that neither adult draws the children into arguments, disgruntlements or disagreements. They should never feel like they have to pick sides or are place in the middle of a dispute. Keep things positive and vent only to other trusted adults. The children are maintaining a relationship with both parents and should not be used as messengers or sounding boards.

Taking care of yourself before providing care for others around you is absolutely necessary. There is enough stress going on. Neglecting yourself will only make things worse. Pursue your passions, take some pamper time, hang out with your friends, or set aside some quality quiet time. That way when it comes time to focus on the children, there is a sense of peace and calm.

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Author Bio:-

Paul advises people on divorce and family law matters. You can find his thoughts at Weebly blog.

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