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The Giggle Corner
Created on July 19th, 2010

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ianb1970
joined Jul 2010
popularity 8
followers 78
posts 74

Jul 19th 2010 at 12:41 PM
There's always jokes and funny happenings floating around on the internet, share some here with the Coffee Shop visitors :-)


ianb1970
joined Jul 2010
popularity 8
followers 78
posts 74

Jul 19th 2010 at 12:43 PM
A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing." "What do they say?" the priest asks.

They say, "Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?!"

"That's obscene!" the priest exclaimed, then he thought for a moment.

"You know, I have two male talking parrots that I have taught to pray and read the Bible.

Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we'll put them in the cage with Francis and Job. My parrots can teach your parrots to praise and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time.

"Thank you," the woman said, "this may be the solution."

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest's house. As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying.

Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them.

After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison: "Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?

There was stunned silence.

Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed, "Put the beads away, Frankie, our prayers have been answered!"


ianb1970
joined Jul 2010
popularity 8
followers 78
posts 74

Jul 19th 2010 at 12:51 PM
A man receives a call from his Credit Card Company, “Sir, we have detected an unusual pattern of spending on your card, and we are calling to see if everything is alright.”

“Yes,” replied the man. “My card was stolen over a month ago.” “Why didn’t you report your card as stolen?” asked the card company representative.

The man replied, “Well, whoever stole my card is spending a lot less than my wife!”


Pattyde
joined Jul 2010
popularity 8
followers 154
posts 7

Jul 20th 2010 at 17:56 PM
Get Your Own! | More Flash Toys


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ianb1970
joined Jul 2010
popularity 8
followers 78
posts 74

Jul 24th 2010 at 17:18 PM
Obituary printed in the London Times

Interesting and sadly rather true.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
I Know My Rights,
I Want It Now,
Someone Else Is To Blame,
and I'm A Victim
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.


http://www.imfaceplate.c
(mohd)
joined Jul 2010
popularity 2
followers 4
posts 26

Jul 26th 2010 at 2:58 AM
This post/comment has been removed due to violations of our terms of use.


http://www.imfaceplate.c
(mohd)
joined Jul 2010
popularity 2
followers 4
posts 26

Jul 27th 2010 at 22:05 PM
This post/comment has been removed due to violations of our terms of use.


maureenv1
joined Jul 2010
popularity 6
followers 81
posts 6

Jul 31st 2010 at 23:25 PM
A french fry walks into a bar.

The bartender says "Get out, we don't serve food here."


ianb1970
joined Jul 2010
popularity 8
followers 78
posts 74

Aug 3rd 2010 at 11:13 AM
I wonder…

1.Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

2.What WAS the best thing before sliced bread?

3.What would chairs look like if our knees bent the other way?

4.If you choke a smurf, what colour does it turn?

5.If you cross a four leaf clover with poison ivy, would you get a rash of good luck?

6.If all the world's a stage, and all the people players, why isn't there better acting on 'Shortland St'?

7.If a no-armed man has a gun, is he armed?

8.If you got into a taxi and the driver starts driving backwards, does she/he owe you money?

9.If con is the opposite of pro, then is Congress the opposite of progress?

10.If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?


ianb1970
joined Jul 2010
popularity 8
followers 78
posts 74

Aug 19th 2010 at 13:41 PM
A man goes to the doctors feeling a little ill.

The doctor checks him over and says, "Sorry, I have some bad news, you have Yellow 24, a really nasty virus. It's called Yellow 24 because it turns your blood yellow and you usually only have 24 hours to live.
There's no known cure so just go home and enjoy your final precious moments on earth."

So he trudges home to his wife and breaks the news.
Distraught, she asks him to go to the bingo with her that evening as he's never been there with her before.

They arrive at the bingo and with his first card he gets four corners and wins £35.

Then, with the same card, he gets a line and wins £320.
Then he gets the full house and wins £1000.
Then the National Game comes up and he wins that too getting £380,000.

The bingo caller gets him up on stage and says, "Son, I've been here 20 years and I've never seen anyone win four corners, a line, the full-house and the national game on the same card.
You must be the luckiest man on Earth!"

"Lucky?" he screamed.
"Lucky? I'll have you know I've got Yellow 24."

"Bugger me!" says the bingo caller, "You've won the raffle as well!"


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